Good afternoon. The President of Mexico would like to make an announcement.
Unfortunately, she will not be able to make the announcement because she is currently the President of Mexico and therefore lacks the authority necessary to solve the big problems facing Mexico.
Fortunately, she has recently accepted an additional position.
President of the Drug Cartel Trade and Lobbying Group.
I’d like to congratulate her.
As President of Mexico she possesses approximately half the authority required to do her job effectively. Thankfully, by becoming President of the Drug Cartels she now possesses the other half.
This will greatly improve governmental efficiency.
Beginning Monday, all cabinet meetings will be consolidated into one convenient location rotating across cartel Big Houses. Complimentary chips, cheese and salsa will always be provided; as will shots of Tequila.
The Minister of Transportation would like more highways. The Minister of Finance would like more tax revenue. The Minister of Defense would like more security.
The cartels would like all three.
Ladies and gentlemen, we’re finally getting things done.
People continue to misunderstand leadership. Leadership isn’t about bringing people together around a common vision. Leadership is about becoming the leader of every organization preventing you from accomplishing your vision.
If your employees won’t listen to you, become the CEO.
If Congress won’t cooperate, win an election.
If the dog won’t come when you call him, become the dog.
I’m not saying it’s practical. I’m merely saying we’ve been unnecessarily limiting ourselves.
There have been criticisms of the President holding two offices simultaneously. We reject these criticisms. The modern world demands multitasking.
Mexicans and Americans expect their politicians to be politicians. That’s terribly old fashioned.
Today’s leaders should possess diverse skill sets:
President. CEO. Influencer. Actor. Professional Wrestler. Part-time astronaut.
No comments:
Post a Comment