Familiy dysfunction

 Every family dysfunction has boiled over since my dad elected to move to skilled nursing.  And what I'm learning is he's the problem.  Communication has been strained with him and the care team.  He is behaving inappropriately.  He tries to be in control of things when he is incapable.  And he gets irritated when people lose patience with him.

For example - he's having surgery next week.  The care team had questions about post op care.  He attempts to get information from a doctors office and then he attempts to send it to everyone else.  He sends a half written message to everyone at 0900.  I call him at 1100 and ask him if the rest of the message is coming.  He says he sent it.  I didn't receive anything.  I then ask if he can just tell me the information.  He says 'no - hold your horses.'  And 45 minutes later he sends a partial message with no information.  

A member of his care team calls me out of frustration and lack of communication.  They asked him to share the information and he said no.  Like WTH?  How is anyone supposed to help him when he is gatekeeping all the information and refuses to communicate.  Or tries to communicate and cant?  He has to do it his way.  Regardless of how inefficient it is.  No one has time to way nearly 3 hours for communication started at 0900.  And once again, that leaves me to pick up the pieces and smooth over his dysfunction with the people that are trying to take care of him.

It's like he thinks he has something to prove....  that he's not a decrepit old man and he's "still got it" with how the tries to present himself.  All he's doing is looking more incompetent with every delayed or half baked message.  Then when he gets irritable with people trying to help him, he's making it worse.  Now he's looking stubborn and pig headed.  Especially when he's holding things up trying to make himself look like he's still capable.  While he is capable, he never learned that sometimes you just have to check the box and get it done.  It doesn't have to be perfect.  It needs to be completed in a timely manner.  Perfection is overrated.

He's the hub of information.  He controls when, who gets and what information is distributed.  To people who are trying to help him that need information to plan.  Unbelievable.  So now it's figuring out how to work around him for his own good.  

Why do elderly people have to be so darn stubborn!?!?  To be independent?  To make it look like they are in control of their life?  To prove they're capable?  I get it.  The thing is the world doesn't move at the speed of an elderly person.  It moves at it's speed while he's moving in slow motion.  The rest of us are living in the real world trying to get things done.  Not only in our lives, but in his too.  Step aside and let us help you before you alienate everyone trying to help.  Elderly people are like old cars.  They're tired, worn and persnickety.  It takes a special driver to tend to their needs.  

Government incompetence

Proof elected officials are self serving. They have allowed tsa employees to work without pay for more than 40 days while those responsible for running the country continue demonstrating their gross dysfunction, wild incompetence and irresponsible self entitlement. The ruling class always prioritizes themselves, illegal aliens or countries before the citizens of this country. Nothing will ever change. Burn our government institutions to the ground.

The crazy in me

The crazy in me doesn't believe there can possibly be this much disruption in the food supply with repeated recalls of beef possibly containing particles of metal and other agriculture and dairy products contaminated with listeria.

Is this a breakdown in production, employees not following protocol or a concerted effort by the certain ideologies in society to discourage the eating of food derived from animal sources? 

Fecal matter contaminating both animal and vegetable foods?  Production, safety, preparation and inspection procedures compromised or not being followed?  Bypassed?  Breakdowns in training and compliance?  Compromised integrity?  Too much demand?   

It seems suspect that in the last decade or so there have been more food recalls than the entire 50 previous years. I dont think it's a coincidence or an accident.

Perhaps the food supply is being stressed? Idk.

Something ain't right.

The last year

 I'm not quite sure how to classify the last 12 months or the last 7 months.  In that amount of time my mom died.  I left a career I knew for nearly 20 years and I've been kinda stuck.  Stuck in not knowing what to do or what to think or how to move my life forward; making the last year one of the worst in my 55 year existence on this planet.

In addition to dealing with the loss of my mom and my career, I am also dealing with the decline of my father and navigating the final chapters in his life.  I am also dealing with the loss of another career.

In the last year I have gained 30 lbs.  Stress.  Laziness.  Uncertainty.  Lack of control.  Lack of direction.  Unsure how to proceed.

I took a mismatched job in January out of desperation.  As of yesterday, I quit my job after deciding I am better than this class of losers.  It all started with uncivilized customers, a complete lack of integrity by my manager and the final two nails in the coffin was some asshole screaming at me over mishearing his year/make/model on the phone and another uncivilized asshole throwing an alternator down on the counter and angrily grunting "WARRANTY."  No more.  I am done with this chapter. These people are better fit living in cages rather than being dysfunctional members of society.  They are angry.  They are uncivilized.  They are losers. 

Who you spend time with determines who you will become.  Now to seek out quality relationships and quality organizations to become part of.   

Now on to chart the next chapter.

First step - taking control of my health and wellness.  I've decided to explore floor/chair exercises and kettle bell exercises.  Carving out hours in my week to walk, ride or attempting the gym isn't realistic at this stage in life.  I want to exercise efficiently and build strength.  All the research I've done has pointed me to the kettle bell and floor exercises for efficiency, ability to build real world strength and do it in a reasonable amount of time per day.  So...  off we go and image rehabilitation starts today.

Next step - becoming more intentional in my job search.  A friend pointed out my strategy for 2025 has to change for 2026.  Now it's time to put myself out there and start turning over rocks I have been reluctant to do.  More in person interactions and honing my "elevator pitch."  Efficiently describing myself and what I want to be part of. 

 

 

 

Delightful

In the late 70s we went to Fredericksburg to get some of the famous hill country peaches. I don't know if they still have them or if they've gone snooty turning it to wine country instead of peach country.

Anyway, he used to eat peaches and cream ice cream. I think we made it once or twice. And my dad always talked about Joe Paterno's peach icecream made at the creamery at penn state university.

Apparently Penn State is famous for ice cream. Who knew?!?

At the store I saw HEB creamy creations Peaces and Cream ice cream. I bought it a week or two ago out of a yearning for nostalgia for some reason. I didn't have any until tonight…

Let me tell you - it is delicious! A stunning flavor that is a true delight to the taste buds. Decadent and creamy with that oh so good peaches and cream flavor reminding me of a time so very long ago. Spectacular flavor and highly recommended!

Truth

Immigrants

They don't make this country great. They may have at one time but don't any more. They contribute to the Enshittification of America.  They are not capable of integrating with or living in a civilized society.