Hear him roar

Was tiger woods always a drug addict or did he become one over time? Addicted to fame, the game and sex. Then his body got all torn up due to abuse and multiple surgeries. He’s been in multiple car accidents found in an inebriated state.

Caregiving

 I realized I have been a caregiver to my parents in one form or another since my dad got parkinsons.  That's longer than a decade.  A time that started out relatively uncertain with his diagnosis and watching both of them decline to my mom's death last year and my dad's continued decline.  It started out with check ins.  And progressed to supporting their decisions and taking them to medical appointments and being a sounding board as their capability declined.  To the point they weren't eating properly and were malnourished.  They couldn't live in their house because they were hoarders.  I moved them to an assisted living community.  Then to memory care.  Then to another assisted living room in the same facility.  After my mom died, my dad pursued radical treatment for parkinsons and had to move him to a skilled nursing facility or a private care home.  And now I am dealing with his decline on multiple fronts, managing his medical care, trying to manage his psychological care and managing the relationships be continually manages to strain every other week.  And I realize he is a challenging and complicated individual.  I've gone from including him in discussions about his finances and medical care to worker around him and providing him with a summary.  I've watched him mentally decline whether he admits it or not.  And now I deal with a guy who thinks he has something to prove he's still got it when he clearly doesn't.  It's exhausting and it feels like it will not end any time soon.  The situation will not improve.  It will get worse as his decline continues, parkinsons marches on and I'm left to hold his life together. While holding their lives together as best I can - I've damaged my own life. My own psychology, my career, my well being and the relationships with my immediate family.  Because I'm worn down.  Tired.  Burned out.  And just don't care anymore.  

The bottom was leaving my career before being unable to adequately perform.  Things have gotten better as I've made decisions to work on myself and take control of things I am able that don't relate to caring for my Dad.  But he is always needing something and can't say I could have held on to my job.  I can say that the auto parts store would not have put up with the last 3 weeks of responsibilities that have popped up tending to his medical appointments, procedures and breakdowns in the institutions that are needed to get him what he needs.  Sometimes the best run medical practices go through personnel transitions and cases fall through the cracks.  Thankfully the neurology office is a football field away from my house.  They may not answer the phone or return telephone calls, but being able to "pop in" to see them in person for resolution has been the only way to get this train wreck back on track...

I was perusing the facebook and a guy named Neal K Shah found his way to my feed.  He describes himself as America's chief elder officer and CEO of careyaya.  I watched a few of his videos.  The hit my right between the eyes and the center of the heart.  Caregiving is hard.  It sucks.  It is documented to re-wire the caregiver, evolve (strain and damage) relationships in unforeseen ways, sucks the life completely out of the one providing the care.

I don't know what I'm complaining about because I'm not as far in as other people.  At least my father invested and saved to fund this stage of both my mom's life and his own.  I can't imagine the strain other people are under where a declining parent moves in or doesn't have the financial resources to partially shift the burden to professionals. 

I'm pleased with the relationship my sister and I have cultivated over the last few years.  While she is not in the thick of caregiving for my mom or dad, she has been through the wringer with her own husband's demise after an auto tragedy.  She has been instrumental in giving me a space to bitch and moan about the situation and we've had quite a few good laughs about dad, his stubbornness and the fact that he's a demanding and obtuse pain in the ass. 

While Mr. Shah's shared information isn't revolutionary, it's concise and manages to explain the burden along with the emotional, psychological and relational cost and incurred damage associated with caring for elderly parents in decline. Interested to see if he has any ideas to dig one's life out of the hole that is long-term caregiving for elderly parents on the decline.

 

 

Narcan

Austin will soon have 45 free narcan distribution points. They claim it’s an effort to reduce barriers to access. Funny there aren't any barriers to access the vices that require narcan.  Darwinism needs to be celebrated and embraced now more than ever.

Pathetic

What kind of monster threatens to bomb power plants and bridges and other infrastructure used by civilians? Radicalize a nation against the west? This is how to do it.

Iran

If America is so afraid of Iran developing nuclear weapons, taking out the research and production facilities only delays the inevitable. Without destroying the human and intellectual know how behind the threat, the threat will always exist.

Hotel coffeemakers

Apparently washing underwear in an in room hotel coffeemaker is a thing…. I wonder if putting a remote control in your underwear or an orifice is a thing, too? Or what about unloading some jizz in one of their glasses?

The article states the coffeemakers aren't sanitized between stays. I wonder if any of the other items mentioned above are?

People are sick.

Friction

 Multi-culturalism causes friction.  If I can't understand them, can they really understand me?  My father is participating in duopa treatment for parkinsons.  They have an ambassador program.  I called to be "partnered" with an ambassador.  A representative called from duopa and left a message.  I read the text and the representative's name was Ashrafi.  Without listening to the message I called back.  Ashrafi is an indian woman with a thick accent.  Nevermind.  I hung up.  Like this is the most qualified woman to match volunteer ambassadors to perspective clients with a toll free number?  Is she here on a H1b visa?  

I don't want to struggle to understand an indian woman on the phone in america.  Unnecessary friction created by not having people proficient in the english language.  I wonder if she drives a tesla with a New Driver Please be Kind sticker.  Have you ever called Amazon and had the pleasure of speaking with an indian asshole attempting to provide customer service reading from a script stretching a rubberband as they speak as an anchor to the training they've received to emulate american dialogue norms that goes contrary to their native language - the sounds, cadence, pronunciation, etc?

Maybe this is why most companies have online chat to talk to a customer service agent.  So it is not evident we are speaking to a foreigner in another country while conducting business in america to reduce costs.

SMH 

What kind of shit is this?

https://youtu.be/MgJRnCNLW_I?si=DXqnQv77m0TcAGiZ